"Hi, I'd like to report a landscape fire?"

On Sunday, my four cousins and I were leaving a bridesmaid dress fitting when my one cousin asked, "Is that a fire over there?"

Immediately, the three of us looked around at all of the surrounding buildings yet saw nothing.

"Over there. In the landscaping!"

Sure enough, there was a small fire starting up in the mulch close to the parking lot. Presumably from a thrown cigarette.

Another reason why smoking is gross and awful.

But anyway.

"Should we call 911?" We all wondered aloud, watching the little fire dance around the mulch in front of us.

We quickly agreed that 911 was a good idea. Sure, the fire was small now, but what if it grew bigger? Lives were at stake!

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"Hi, I'd like to report a landscape fire?" I said to the 911 operator.

"Okay. Where are you at?" he asked, not sounding very concerned.

I gave him the address and frantically added, "A bush is about to be inflamed!!!!"

He told me that the fire department would soon be over, still seemingly apathetic regarding this fire that was eating up Northern Kentucky shrubbery.

For the next 120 seconds, we watched as the fire died down.

"This is going to be SO embarrassing when the fire department gets here!!!! It needs to start back up!!!" We all exclaimed, hoping a gust of wind or some other factor would make the fire at least a little scarier looking.

When a small fire department truck pulled up, we all breathed a sigh of relief. The small truck seemed appropriate for the little landscape fire. We didn't feel so overdramatic, after all!

WOOOOOOOWOOOOOO

Oh, yes. It was the sound of sirens.

And then the huge, blaring fire engine began to rumble down the small street.

The firefighters hopped out and took one look at our "fire" before bursting out laughing.

It was at that time we decided to discretely drive away.